It had been a long and frustrating day. I'd been bombarded by banality at work for ten hours and Chris (having the fortune of recently working nights) had been harangued by accountants all day. Obviously the salvation, we hoped, would be found sitting in traffic on Vic Park's main (and only??) street.
I mean seriously, is there another road in Vic Park? From what we could tell, all of Perth's southern-bound traffic was funnelled into this one-laned HELL backed up behind some bespecticalled turtle attempting the world's most cautious right-hand turn.
But our night was about to change.
V Burger Bar is a groovy, bright little shopfront flanked by the nondescript takeaway joints that are a dime a dozen in Vic Park. Inside is a small space, but roomy enough for us to eat comfortably on a Wednesday night. Staff were friendly and appeared genuinely keen to make sure we were enjoying ourselves. You just get the feeling that these guys enjoy what they do.
Wow. Just wow. I'm extremely hesitant to start throwing out the superlatives on our first review, but this was a damn good meal.
Looking through the menu, it was a true struggle to decide with some enticing options. Even the obligatory basic "Classic V" still comes with relish and aioli. Burger variety extends to the piscine in the form of "Mr Pinky"- a tasmanian salmon fillet with honey mustard and 2 (count 'em- 2) vegitarian options. But let's be serious. After making the harrowing Vic Park journey eating a vegitarian burger would be akin to taking a shower in a raincoat.
A good ten minutes of mouth-watering indecision later I had settled on the "Pepperizo" ($12.50), while Chris, despite temptation from the battered onion of the "Crispy Crisp" ($11) finally settled on the "FBA (Full Blooded Aussie)."
The patty was quality beef. Thick and luscious. None of your thawed-and-flayed rubbish here. Lightly peppered, but cooked to perfection.
And while we're at it, my thanks to V Burger for not labelling any of their beef "Angus". I mean, really. Since when was angus beef gourmet? Angus beef is just beef. But I'm straying from my point.
If you look carefully you'll note the chorizo lying atop the patty. It takes the concept of bacon on a burger and says "I can so fricken do better than that." And it does. What should be an excess instead works as naturally as icing on a cake.
The one weakness of the burger might be the peppers, which were a little greasy and added to the the bulk of an already hefty burger. Fortunately, the burger was still small enough for eating with hands, saving it the dreaded 5-Point Knife And Fork Deduction. Burgers henceforth be warned. If I need cutlery, you will invoke our wrath in blog form.
Chris was equally satisfied with his "Full-Blooded Aussie," which was exactly as satisfying as it promised to be. Beef, bacon (always a prerequisite on a Chris burger), egg, beetroot, salad, BBQ sauce and the ever-present aioli. And no Knife-And-Fork Deduction here either. Just awesome.
The chips scored massive kudos for being hand-cut, a rarity but a highly valued one. They were crisp and well-seasoned. The lime sweet chilli mayo dip ($1) was a bit gluggy and disappointing. Next time I'll be trying the aioli.
A burger, chips and drink came in at $17.50, with an extra $1 for chip dipping sauce if you wanted it. About par for the course for a decent burger bar.
We both just liked the vibe of the place. The main dude came around on a busy night just to check we were enjoying ourselves. I feel bad I couldn't answer, but speaking time is just burger eating time that you don't get back. The concern is that we go too early with high scores on this blog, but right now I just don't care. This was a damn good burger
Burger (/10) 9
Chips (/5) 4
Value (/5) 3
Total (/20) 16
In some sort of delirium I found myself driving the streets of Vic Park looking for that pick me up that I so badly needed after working all night and dealing with number monkey's all day, I felt like some sort of junkie in the seedy underbelly of Perth looking for that hit, that one salvation that would calm me down and restore order to my life, but what was it?
Best plan was to consult my Doctor, hell the way I was feeling it was best just to bring him with me.....so I did, just as well as someone had to look out for the burger bar!
Following my Doctors orders, and directions (no mean feat, he's not from around these parts) we proceeded directly to the one place he knew would have the cure for my situation, a burger bar. We didn't know it but these were our first steps along the journey that is now our quest, nay our destiny........Cam and Chris's Burger Odyssey.
Blink and you might miss it, well not with the traffic the way it is through Vic Park, you will actually stare at it so much it will drive you insane, the wicked temptress that is V Burger Bar. But luckily someone mentioned it was over the road from a pub, so I knew where it was and secretly V gained an extra point for location in my books.
The other nice point is that the guy who owns the store is the guy that takes your order and cooks your burger, and then still takes time to see if you enjoyed it. Good job.
Faark, is what I thought and said when I saw my burger come out, no superlatives to start with here just plain old potty mouth.
The choice in itself was difficult to make, well not once you got rid of the vego and fish options (not a true burger unless it has flesh in it), yes I know all you little pinko, poofo, greenie tree huggers need to feel equal when eating out too, but seriously with out a healthy level of red meat in your anemic shell of a body I don't think that you could lift a V burger to take a bite, let alone chew, swallow and digest it, I digress.
So that leaves me with a more manageable list to contemplate.
This is then shortened again rather quickly for me based on Nettervilles 1st Law of Hypercholesterolaemia that is: a good burger has bacon and cheese on it.
I must admit the Law was thrown a curly one with the choice that the good Doctor had made, the Pepperizo, but I stuck to my guns and found the FBA (Full Blooded Aussie) to be ticking almost all the boxes for me, I had to ask for bacon to be added ($1.50).
So ordering complete the Doctor and myself sat and waited, we had an idle 10 min on our hands so we planned world domination, cured cancer, re-jigged the flux capacitor on our Delorian and drank soft drink.
Then Bam! I was hit with my FBA, it was impressive, grand, almost regal sitting aloft its porcelain tower. Then reality hit me, was I gonna be able to pick the bastard up and eat it in one go or were the old eating irons going to have to make an appearance? I went at it manually and got the better of it just, Oh V burger such a fine line you tread with the 5 point penalty but thats why we love you!
The patty was thick, well seasoned and juicy, yet cooked all the way through as a good burger should be, and all the ingredients in the burger could be seen clear as day without having to send out a search party.
Not really a fan of the Turkish roll that it was served on, however the bread to filling ratio was spot on.
The chips were crisp and golden, but too much of a challenge after a burger of that proportion. I suggest, at the risk of being labelled soft, that a portion shared is a better option, and more romantic too.
Not the cheapest Burger in town, but they do a meal combo that was great value for the price about $17.50 for burger, chips and a drink. I left feeling satisfied and knowing that like a true Terminator, I'll be back.
It has a good feel to the place, there is something for everyone on the menu, you feel like you have had a proper meal and not broken the bank and then you can pop over the road for a pint!
Burger (/10) 8 asking for bacon is a no-no
Chips (/5) 4
Value (/5) 3.5
Location bonus point 1
Total (/20) 16.5
Nothing too contriversial here yet, with only one entry. It's at this point of the review that we'll be seeing where the burger sits against the rest of Perth.
Next up for review is the famous Alfreds in Guildford. Will we escape with our teeth? Find out soon!
V Burger Bar can be found at 12 910 Albany Hwy,
East Victoria Park, WA 6101